NBA Faces Pay Cuts

Obama "Pay Czar,"  lawyer Kenneth R. Feinberg, former Chief of staff for Sen. Edward Kennedy, has expanded his personal regulation on pay in the US to the NBA.  On Face the Nation today, Czar Feinberg, did admit to making a "C" in an online Compensation 101 class this summer at the University of Phoenix. Czar Feinberg said "real change demands we regulate more than just a few CEOs."

The NBA has decided to reduce it's salaries since many make more than CEOs.  This blog has discovered that fewer and fewer poor people in the US are able to afford tickets to NBA games, which are played in cities which *receive federal tax money*.

This blog also discovered that last year the following players - for teams that had results and some teams that did not even make the playoffs  - make over $15,000,000: from the almost $25 million per year paid to 1) Kevin Garnett (Boston), 2)Jason Kidd (Dallas), 3)Jermaine O'Neal (Toronto), 4) Kobe Bryant (LA Lakers), 5) Shaquille O'Neal (Phoenix), 6)Allen Iverson (Detroit), 7)Stephon Marbury (New York), 8) Tim Duncan (San Antonio), 9) Tracy McGrady (Houston), 10) Ray Allen (Boston), 11) Dirk Nowitzki (Dallas), 12) Paul Pierce (Boston), 13) Shawn Marion (Miami), 14) Rashard Lewis (Orlando), 15) Michael Redd (Milwaukee), 16)Pau Gasol (LA Lakers), 17)Andrei Kirilenko (Utah), 18)Amare Stoudemire (Pho.), to the $15 million paid to 19)Yao Ming (Houston).

CAPTION: Koby Bryant defiantly showing his number 24 which represents the nearly $24 million dollar salary he made last year playing basketball just a few months per year.  Many service workers, working 12 months per year, make well under $30,000 per year.

The teams are taking different staffing approaches to comply with the new standards - that NBA players be paid salaries similar to Service Worker union employees (about $40,000/year).  The LA Lakers, for instance, are dumping Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol - who have been drawing salaries today considered "unAmerican" and worse, capitalistic.  The new, progressive Lakers are recruiting older Americans to play.


73 year old Ken Mink, (right) who is the oldest person to play college basketball, has been hired to replace Gasol as center.  Phil "Crazy Legs" Coats (right below) will replace Bryant.  Both will work for $40,000 per year and will receive the "public option" for their medical insurance.

Other teams are trying to come into compliance with the Czar's orders and lowering ticket prices by hiring younger people to fill the roster.

The Celtics are releasing the greedy Kevin Garnett and replacing him with "more youthful" players from the Central Warren Youth Basketball league.  "Change is what we need in the NBA" according to the Pay Czar.  Reporters on CBS Good Morning America were certain that fans will be glad to cheer on players and teams with more enlightened pay policies.  A CNN reporter said, "a chill ran up my spine when I heard about my dream coming true - fair pay and ticket prices I will be able to afford."